The Clint Danger Wells Approach to Happiness: Introduction

     I don't really know where I'm going to go with this. Maybe it will just be one half-assed blog post and I will leave it at that. Perhaps it will be in a series of installments that I will continue to elaborate on, add chapters, add content, etc... But bare with me as I sort my thoughts and get this thing rolling.

     The Definition of Happiness: a: a state of well-being and contentment : joy b: a pleasurable or satisfying experience

     This is obviously a textbook definition of happiness (or copy and pasted from the Merriam Webster dictionary website). Since textbook definitions of emotions fit like square pegs in round holes when it comes to real life, let's try to break down that definition and apply it to reality. When we break down that definition, we'll come to the conclusion that happiness is inherently flawed and that the supposed sources of happiness are also our sources of being upset and discontent.

     A State of Well-being and Contentment; Pleasurable experiences

     Simple enough. You just aced an exam, got a promotion/raise at work, the weather outside is nice, yadda yadda yadda. The list of things that can cause well-being, contentment, and joy are limitless. Since I don't know who is going to be reading this, I'll have to use myself as an example  to help make sense of what I'm trying to convey. The key is to ask yourself, "What puts 'me' in a state of contentment and joy?" The short list for me would be the following: drinking that first morning coffee, Reading a good book, having a successful workout, going on long walks, listening to a particular song, eating certain foods, and being outside in the sun. Looking at the surface of these experiences, you would say that they don't have a whole lot in common. It's when you dig deeper that the realization of their commonality comes out: situational impermanence. By definition impermanence means, "not permanent, lasting, or durable." What this means, is the feelings that we get when we do things we like, these situations of bliss, last only a short while. They are then followed by (albeit usually small) moments of grief and despair.
     "What do you mean? I thought this was about being happy? How do the happy moments create grief and despair?"
     The inherent impermanence of the actions that cause happiness is the reason why they are, on a sub conscious level, associated with grief and despair. How often do you drink that cup of coffee or eat the certain food item only to be slightly disappointed when you get to the last bite or get to the bottom of the cup? How often do you spy the house or the car after your long walk and realize that it's over and you have to go back to real life? Then there is the feeling of finishing a good book. You just spent days, weeks, months, reading a book and being in that "world" only to have it come to an end. Sometimes feeling a sense of loss not having their lives be a part of yours anymore. As you can (hopefully) see, the things that make you happy will only make you happy for brief moments; leaving you wanting to reach that level of happiness again and being in want of that happiness most of the time. If you really want to see this in action, look at methamphetamine and other drug addicts. They are constantly trying to get themselves in there state of happiness. Each time the drug wears off they go through withdrawal, get aggravated, and do anything to obtain that high. Once there though, you can see the bliss on their faces. But each subsequent time, they need more, and they need it more often. It is all about the pleasure centers of the brain. I won't get into it, but food addicts are the same way. Except the despair after eating could include guilt, wanting those taste sensations again, heartburn, and indigestion.

     Okay, so the "things" that make us happy can and do lead to despair. How does this play into happiness at all? Does this mean that we are destined to be in a cycle of misery and let downs?
    
     That question leads into the first lesson of being happy: Realizing the "emptiness" of our lives and learning to embrace it for what it is.

     More to come...

New Years Resolutions Revisited

I have been working on a post to nail down some tips on how to achieve New Years Resolutions without failing, or at least, make it past the typical 30-60 day initiation. I could write on and on about how, perhaps, "failure to plan is planning to fail" and that calling it a "diet" and and not a "lifestyle" change is a recipe for quitting. While I had a lengthy draft written out, I decided it was best to delete it and cut my losses. I have written diet and exercise plans in the past and it turned out to be the biggest waste of time. Here are some bullet points and I'll simply leave it at that

-Failure to plan is planning to fail: Go into your weight loss/fitness regime with a clear cut plan. Half-assing it is a surefire way to minimize your results. Plans can be modified, but only if you make them

-80% of weight loss/body composition is diet related- Eat like crap and exercise? Sure, you'll see some results. Eat really healthy and skimp on some of the exercise and you'll see more results this way. I do believe the latter of the two would be the easiest. But take the hard road if you want. EXAMPLE: I was running 40-60 miles per week, eating grains, and weighed in around 175. I cut the running, lift weights 3 days per week,do Tabata sprints, reverted to the paleo diet, and I'm down 5 pounds and I am more lean.

-If you can last two weeks, you can last 1 month. If you can last 1 month, you'll see the results that will make you want to stick with it.

Have confidence. Eat to live, don't live to eat.

New Years Resolutions

Let's pretend it's one week ago. People everywhere are beginning to say to themselves, "This is the year I'm going to do it. I'm going to start exercising and lose this weight." Or they'll say, "I'm going to start my diet and exercise plan on the first of the New Year. Unlike last year, I am definitely going to stick with it."

Let the gourging commence! It seems that the week leadin up to the New Year's resolution to 'lose weight and exercise' gives people the golden ticket to eat whatever they like in an unadulterated amount. They look at the resolution as a huge sacrifice so they better get in the food that they love before they cut it out cold turkey. Personally, I've sat there and watched it happen at work. One coworker in particular was telling me that she was going to cut all snack foods and get serious about weight loss as she was slamming a bag of Doritos. All I could do was shake my head in agreement. It was like watching an alcoholic explain his path to being substance free as he was pouring another double shot.

With January 1, 2012 comes the Post New Year's Workout Syndrome The resolutionists pack it into the gyms nationwide. Any person that regularly attends a gym can spot the resolutionists. It has nothing to do with the fact that they are overweight and out of shape, it's the fact that they look lost and scared. They wander around the weight room, watching others, maybe pick up a weight and do something with it. Or perhaps they'll saunter over to a treadmill or stationary bike. Standing there on the belt, looking at the buttons like they are some sort of hieroglyph, they'll hit the quick start button only to realize that 5 minutes into it that the treadmill is rather boring.

3 weeks to 1 month later, homeostasis is restored at the gym. The resolutionist that came in with no plan and too much sacrifice has given up. I have never figured out the actual statistics, but I would be willing to bet that over 75% of the "lose weight and get healthy" resolutions fail. Why do they fail? The people that pick these resolutions aren't necessarily failures at everything that they do. These people can be among some of the most successful business types, teachers, doctors, lawyers, etc... The list can go on. So what makes someone who is successful in many aspects of life fail at something so simple as a diet and exercise? Lack of planning, too many restrictions, calling it a diet, and no accountability all lead to the demise of the New Years resolution. Are these the only things that cause failure in the resolutions? No. But these are ones that can be addressed and remedied rather easily. It just takes a little effort.

Over the course of the next week, I am going to post on different topics that can make your New Years resolution a lifestyle instead of a month long debacle.